Recap

Last day of classes. Last CRU of the semester (last night). Last weekend living on campus. Last bible study with Laura Ward and the girls (this past Tuesday). Saying goodbye to the Flynn's and the Flacks. Saying goodbye to Huffman Hall. Saying goodbye to the amazing seniors. 

This has all either happened or will be happening this weekend. The last, saying goodbyes, endings...it's bittersweet. All endings bring new beginnings. Big things are going to happen at JMU through Campus Crusade, even more than what has already happened. God isn't surprised by any of this. He timed this all perfectly, and He is going to show up in some mighty ways. As students (and staff), we have to be open and willing to His plan and be prepared to be used by Him in any way we see Him calling us. Crusade is going to be taking some big leaps of faith, Crusade is going to be relying solely on God. Whatever fall we may take during it all, we can be assured that He will be there to catch us.

It has been a great year. A year of tremendous growth in my walk with Jesus, a year of new opportunities, a year of new roles in the body of Christ, a year of being blessed to share His name overseas this summer, a year of securing relationships and mending others. It's been a true blessing to see God work in my life in the last 9 months.

Bound No More

Psalm 22. 

A prophecy. A true story. A sacrifice. A saving grace.

We don't deserve it. 

We should be be mocked. We should be insulted. We should be torn apart by the lions. All of our bones should be out of joint and we should be able to count each one. We should be thirsty. We should be surrounded by a band of evil. Our hands and feet should be pierced. Up on that cross...it should have been us.

But it wasn't. That's the beauty of today. We are worthless sinners who deserve this kind of punishment. But God didn't want that. He wanted us to know Him, to walk alongside of Him in heaven. So He sent His son, Jesus. A perfect man, the greatest man that ever walked this earth...put Himself on that cross. 

He lived to die so we can live eternally. 

He was crucified, put to death in the most painful way known to man. He was put in a tomb, assuming it would constrain Him. The third day...He showed otherwise. He rose from the dead and ascended into heaven to sit at the right hand of God. That death and that resurrection covered our sins, so that when God wants to call us home, we too will join Jesus at the right hand of our Father.

That's the beauty of the gospel. It shouldn't just be remembered on a day like today. It should be made fresh to us on a daily basis. Easter is quite the holiday...chocolate bunnies, dyed eggs, pretty sundresses, and family meals. But what we cannot forget is how are chains have been removed. How we are no longer bound by Satan, but instead freed by our Savior. 

He gave us life, so let's give Him ours.

Happy Easter :)

The Pieces Fall Into Place

This morning at Aletheia was God leading me right to the answers of my prayers these last few weeks. I want to know His love, I mean really know it. The words on the pages are one thing, but it's not until those words are read in my heart that I truly embrace every detail. This morning, that's what happened. Paul took us to the story of Nicodemus this morning in John 3. Every time I heard the name Nicodemus this morning, I could replace my name with his and find the statement to be true. This especially...

"Rabbi, we know you are a teacher who has come from God. For no one could perform the miraculous signs you are doing if God were not with him." -John 3:2

By reading and hearing about Jesus for the majority of my life, I know that He is a great teacher, that He was an extraordinary man. But that's when there's more to it. Satan himself knew Jesus was an extraordinary man. It's knowing what's not seen externally that really mattered to Jesus. His miracles, His parables...they were all wonderful and full of so much Truth. But what Jesus wants us to know is, "I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again." -verse 3

Knowing that Jesus was amazing is one thing, but it's knowing why that's worth His blood. This is something I have been praying to see...why Jesus came, why He loved us so much, why He did the things He did while He walked on this earth. Understanding that will allow me to fully live out the life God has planned for me: loving people like Jesus loved, serving like Jesus served, sacrificing like Jesus sacrificed, and trusting like Jesus trusted. It's all one big puzzle, once you get the outside border figured out...all the inside pieces are so much easier to fit into place. 

I really liked this quote Paul said this morning about the Holy Spirit...

"we won't always see the path, but we always see the evidence."

God's plan for our lives may been invisible to us right now, but each step we take we can look back and be guaranteed that we see the footprint of Him right behind us.

Sophomoritis?

When things get hard, our first instincts is to run and hide...to just give up. Giving up admits defeat, timidity, the lack of trust.

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." -Galatians 6:9

God rejoices in the people who are willing to go all the way for Him. 

It's easy to quit; it takes faith to follow through.

This has really been something God has put on my heart lately. With only 3 weeks left in the semester, my classes are squeezing me for all I have left. Professors are cramming the last of the material, assigning last minute assignments,etc. And what do I want to do? Give up. But the worst thing about it is that I'm using God as an excuse. Instead of putting time into my classes and following through with the task He has set before me as a student, I use the line, "if God wants me to pass, He'll provide the knowledge I need." Now, that is Truth in itself, but not in the way I'm using it. I'm using Him as an excuse not to do my work. That not only shows laziness, but selfishness too. Laziness in the fact that He is giving me ample time to complete the work for my classes, but I'm choosing that time to do other things. Selfishness is seen because I'm putting my desires over that of my priorities. I'm spending time doing what I want to be doing instead of what I should be doing. 

So there you have it. Some call this "spring at JMU," seniors title it "senioritis," but in my case it's the simple fact that I'm giving up on a task God clearly wants me to do well at...not for my sake, but for His glory.

My Attempt at Being Domestic.

 I tried it. And I'm pretty pleased with the results :)

Voila! Fabric Flower Headbands

Peaches and Mangoes

So I did it. I bought it, and I burnt it. I'm a rebel. The smell of it sitting next to me as I stare at my computer or color-code my notes in my notebook is so relaxing. It gets me in the mood for summer. It adds a homey sense to these white-washed walls. It effectively mixes my two favorite fruits into an aroma that I would picture Heaven to smell like.And the best part is, it was only $1.

That's right. My new Peach and Mango candle :)

To help make more sense of the whole "rebel" title, I live in a dorm...therefore candles are a no-no.

Pretty pitiful that this is one of the highlights of my day. Though the aroma of this amazing little glass jar of wax may give me such a simple joy, I experienced another joy today as well. This one, I would say, couldn't quite be contained in a 3 oz. container.

If you weren't privileged to spend a few minutes outside today, let me just tell you that you missed out. Having class until 3:15 was a little sad, seeing that I only had about 2 hours to soak up this spring sensation. Laying under my designated tree located behind Huffman is where I had one of the best times with God I've had in a long time. I feel like I've been pretty open for the most part on my blog, so sharing a part of my time with Jesus will be okay. Understanding God's love is something I thought I had figured out. I mean that I have accepted it, read about, thanked Him for it, etc. and I've been spending time working on pruning other parts of my life. But what I realized today is I have been taking this free love for granted. 

This is some of what I journaled today...

It's so easy for the concept of love to get blurry when one looks at the world. Love is said in the spur of a moment, love is shown in immoral ways, and love is taking on the same definition as lust. Living in this world, no wonder no one knows what love is supposed to look like. That's where God steps in. He uses Christians to reflect this love that has been torn apart by the world. 

[Insert sentence on how I've shown God's love here.]

And that's where I stop. Hit a brick wall. I can't insert a sentence. I haven't been the mirror God is expecting me to be as His disciple. Loving is hard, at least for me. Satan has used this world to distract me and put "strongholds" in my mind, which in turn control my thoughts and ultimately, control my actions. And that's when He showed me...I haven't embraced and understood His love for me at the level of understanding that I'm capable of. God's love is pure, it's sincere, it's real, it's sacrificial. 

My main task: Falling madly in love with God...DAILY.

Reading this may make you think, "how is she living for God if she's not loving others?" And that's a great question. I want to rephrase my struggle...I'm not loving others as effectively as I should. There it is. And in order for me to do that, I have to understand what true love looks like and what it's made of. And the only way to do that is to continue to learn more and more about God on a daily basis. The more we learn, the more we love. The more we love, the bigger He gets. The bigger He gets, the smaller we become.

"The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of this world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." -2 Corinthians 10:4-5

So I challenge you, find out your weakness, your struggle. Don't try to fight it, fix it, or even replace it using the "weapons" of this world. The only weapon that will defeat a spiritual enemy is God's Word. Check it out.

Weakend.

This weekend hit both ends of the spectrum for sure. Roadtripping to Westchester, Pa with Tiff, Genvieve, Erin, and Shannon Marie on Friday included some great conversations, enjoying the voice of our Aussie GPS, and deciding that studying in the car wasn't possible. Saturday was busy. Busy as in there was one break from 3-3:15...haha. But on top of being busy, it was one of the best bonding experiences ever :) I spent give or take 15 hours with my family for the summer (aka my Australia team). Each and every person God has placed on this team has a unique quality/gift that is going to be used so effectively this summer, and I am blessed to say that I get to watch God use them as well as minister alongside of them. Staying up til midnight talking about the amazing things God has done in our lives was such a great glimpse of the awesome conversations to come :)

Sunday, on the other hand...was the other end of the spectrum I referred to. I woke up to Shannon sick as a pup (details will be refrained). And I soon followed... We spent the day together lying in bed from 9am til about 6pm. My first thought would be it was an awful day...but I can't say that. Because well, one, Shannon and I had quite a unique bonding experience to say the least. 

the campground where we stayed

we stayed in the one on the far left...all 6 of us :)

the larger cabins shannon and I spent Sunday in

The ride back wasn't the same without the beautiful Shannon, but blasting Disney music for 4 hours and driving through an amazing lightning storm was pretty awesome.

The cherry on top of this weekend was the Anatomy that followed it. Being completely busy all day Saturday and completely sick all day Sunday...left me no time to study. But this is where God is the man...I took advantage of my professor's office hours Thursday and Friday and have been doing well in lab over the past few weeks. So with only 4 hours to study today before my test, I knew only God would be able to get me through this one. 4 hours may seem like plenty of time to pull off a B or C in most classes, but anatomy is slightly different. Memorizing doesn't quite work...so studying daily is very much encouraged. 

So, here I am. Sitting on my couch, relaxing after a run...feeling confident about my test, excited about my summer, and blessed that I have a God who provides :)

The weather probably played a role in my good mood today as well...